Sunday, September 28, 2008

Dear Blogger,

This pic is taken in one of the ultrasound room. One of the sono's was on duty and there was a Isolation Patient,so she got to be in PPE attire...look how cute she is...

Dear Blogger,

I did managed to take some pic of the sonographers and radiographer as they are heading towards the Gala Dinner with the President...hhhmmtake your pick..

Dear Blogger,

It was a last minute plan and if i want to wait till after raya..i think not..we may be busy, after all this is the month of Ramadan and why not some of my cousins gather together for "Berbuka Puasa"..
So,Siti,Rizaliah and me met up at Bugis and break our fast at Amirah Grill Pahang Street..next to the infamous El-Sheikh...hehhehe..

But hey, i met Rahman and his wife at the Bugis Mrt..the newly marry couple..and saw a fren that i refused to say hello too.."Ms R"..i just walk straight knowing that she has seen me..she was sitting with a group of 'Bikers'.

The buffet at Amirah Grill was simple but not much choice, it was affordable..what a disappointment to me was i couldn't get my caramel pudding like i used to..i miss that..the 3 of us chat,we talk and share some life story till 9.15pm and we drop by Ratianah Boutique..since my dress is ready, i just paid and took it. I was thinking of getting it next week but since i am here, why not. Another long blaus added to my collection.My cupboard is full of it and to me, this is really a big change to me. I couldn't afford much last few year but now, half of my cupboard is full of baju kurung..alhamdulilah

My cousins..siti and riza

That's my dinner

Get them in action

The 3 of us

me n siti

Riza and siti

Riza and me

Dear blogger,

Since the past few weeks, my life is surrounded by doubts and expectations of others feeling or view towards me. I have to talk to someone. I think i need to..gosh i miss Fiza blunt and directness answer or almunawarah "poise" answer..maybe i should confined to Siti Zubaidah, my cousin but i felt this relationship is still 'young' to tell others.

I just don't know where i gone wrong..is it me or i am just not sensitive enough towards men feelings. He just refused to tell me where my mistakes lies but instead, he gave me the silent and cold treatment. Well, i could endure it..i have to be strong if i want this relationship to work but my feelings inside me,is "screaming" to me to leave him and just start a new chapter..i don;t want to me in this situation where i have to give in to him.I will feel, i am just another "Weak" single female...seeking attention....HELP....

Dear Blogger,

Something tell me to stay away from Amir..the feeling inside me..he is a nice man but to "poach" other's "property" its not the way..i should consider the other party feeling..the situation is already bad with me being a 3rd party...

Dear Blogger,

Working life is peaceful when V.C is not around..but when she is in the office, her presence makes everybody feeling restless and unpleasant. I wonder why some staff are afraid of crossing or stepping on her toe? They always wanted to be in her "good book" but how long will it last??The favouritism..her racism and etc..etc..i wonder," WHO THE HELL HIRE HER"...

I try to distance myself and refrain myself from talking much to her did anything that need her attention. In this way, it gave me a piece of mind just from staying that way. Neither am i crossing her or stepping on her toe, which i wanted to very much..if possible "Crush her down like cockroaches...". Avoid is the best word to describe it.

Maybe Allah is guiding me away from evil-doers who want ill-harm toward me..

Dear Blogger,

Ever since i wrote about Zaki Amir/amir in my blog few days ago, i have been receiving numerous sms from frens asking me about him...about the person, his job,his hobby and even the car he drive.

A acquaintance of mine, Ms R sms me,
"how did a guy like him came a chance to get to know me..??"
And i just reply.."He got my number from someone else"..
Ms R ask again.." Its either he is ugly or he quickly need someone /companion as he is getting on his age"
....i was very surprise of her question and thus reply.."I am just lucky that a guy too interest in me although i am a plain fat "Jane"..
there was no reply at the moment until noon..she sms.."You better find out more about the guy before jumping straight into a relationship with the person".

I think there is more than meet the eyes about this matter..and i will dig till i can get the answer.

I don't know Ms R very well. I only met her few times previously when i went out clubbing or Karaoke with my other friends. There is something sinister about this lady..it's like is envy of me or jealous but she should be very pleased that she got a good job,a great partner(although much older than her) and very beautiful body. But it seem,it's like she is not happy with what she have in her life and prefer to comment on others.

Dear blogger,

I contacted some old friends to plan the Hari Raya outing but unfortunately only some reply my sms and call me..while others are undecided whether to join or not. Well, its not confirmed anyway but i was hoping to make this year,since last year was organised by Fadilah and i couldn't join them due to some unforeseen circumstance.

I had dinner with Suzan and later on meet up with her husband at causeway point. We break our "Fast" at Novena Square and later had some cakes at Secret Recepi...wow..its been months since i had that Banana Chocolate Cake...all my pro-diets waste away..hahahah..

I couldn't reply some sms send by Amir today. There is something wrong with my hand phone keypad. I kept switching it off and on again. In the end, i managed to reply him..he was asking me "how was my day today"..and i reply.."It was OK..i told him to join me for dinner on Saturday at Geylang..he refused..of the place,of course. It will be too crowded and very inconvenience..he suggested places likes Chai Chee seafood or Marks Place in Changi Road..i guess maybe its is easy for him since Masjid Khalid is located nest to both restaurants... :((

Hmmm...i was wondering, could he be Faizal cousin-in-law....coz Faizal did mention of the name Zakir Fatin before..or is just a coincidence?I have tried getting some names out of Amir but he just refuse to tell me who gave him my hp no..true loyalty!!!

Dear Blogger,

Did i mention that my sister had a small accident at home,2 days ago?Well, it happen in the early morning while preparing for "Sahur", she was frying something and the pan slip and hot oils landed on her hand..her left hand. It was bad at first.

My niece woke me up and say that,"Mama terkena minyak panas"...

I jolted out of the bed and rush to the kitchen..but i saw her sitting in front of the toilet and putting some toothpaste on her hand...My toothpaste!!! and the kitchen in mess...

Since the time is clocking fast, i quickly cook some Maggie for the whole family and managed to feed them before "Imsak".

Well, my sister visit her GP and got 2 day MC..(lucky devil) but the scars in her hand is still visible..it was bloating.

Dear Blogger,

I had a terrible headache yesterday. I was OK in the morning but when noon approaching, it was a beginning of my mini-migraine. I don't know what is the cause..could it be my high-blood pressure or something that i ate last night.

I couldn't concentrate while walking and have to blink my eyes several times. In the end, i decided to take a taxi home. But still, my head was pounding the whole time i was in the taxi and even feel nausea but i restraint and control myself. I don't want to dirty the taxi and end up got to clean up after that...

I better take good care of myself now. ..my body is precious..and only use once.

Dear Blogger,

I have never expect that the first meeting with Zaki Amirul on the 5th Sept, lead on to the other date..he sms and ask me out again on Wednesday,on 10th sept... i was very reluctant at first..afraid that i may have to join Hidayat and others for 'berbuka' and had to disappoint him..but luckily, the dinner with the gangs was cancelled due to some of us, who was down with bad flu and cough...

So, i met up with him at Orchard Paragon Coffee Bean and had a light meal for "Buka" and off he went for prayer at the nearby mosque,while i wait for him at Paragon..at the same time, a friend whom i have not met for a long time, came over to me and say "Hi"...and we chat a while. Glad that she is now working for another airline and very happy with her "Ang Moh" boyfriend..i am not prejudiced and neither am i, revengeful against that person but i learn to appreciate myself and proud of myself. And if i put myself i her shoe, at that time, maybe i am able to experience what she went thru at that time.

Soo..after around 15-20mins, Zaki came back and we both decided to have proper dinner at Lucky Plaza but due to the influx of tourists crowds(one thing i have learn about him, he hates crowded places..same as me)we decided either Newton or the open space kopitiam near Cineleisure...we headed there...

As for his name, he ask me to either call him Amir or Zak..he find Zaki is like calling a school boy...and Amirul is like calling a "Budak Kampung"..his brother name is Zakir Fatin....now that's interesting and his cousin name is Zaki Zullaiham..wow..turn out his dad is a teacher(ex) from an old school..Siglap and he favour(the dad) literature..no wonder for all the interesting name..guess what is the dad name......Zamirul Hamzah..but i realised all the names have a strong meaning behind it..

Family names is one of topic of the conversations and other than that, we included favourites movies and songs and some intellectual discussion, especially on the younger generations..just few tables away from our tables,are some ex-students of his from the primary school and what a nuisance they are. Either he is not a favourite teacher or they are just some irritated monkeys..they keep on calling him..."Cikgu Zak...kakaka....cikgu kikiki..."But in the end, they stop over at our table and say hello...they are funny bunch of kids..

We left the place at nearly around 11.45pm and he send me home till my block. I advised him earlier not to drive as Orchard will be congested. He send me home in a taxi but i am touched. From CCK to Hougang, the taxi fare is very expensive...but he doesn't mind at all.

I really enjoy going out with him but that's all..i mean there is no special feeling develop yet and i don't want it to be happen yet...maybe i will explain in more details in my next blogging.

Dear blogger,

I always have the skeptical feeling towards guys, who got your hp no from others.

I always wonder what are they up to??What do they want from you??Are they genuine?Are they real in having relationship with gal like me??

Well, to answer all those questions, i go ahead and meet up with them..sometimes i envy Fiza for having the courage to meet up with the guys from Bearshare...it took me a while to meet up with this guy,Zaki whom out of the blue, contact me for the past few weeks..up till now, i really don't know how he got my contact.

Last week i decided to go out with him..for just a simple buka..not a date.. i felt, this meeting is not a date to me, just a small casual meet up with a stranger.

Well,it turn out to be pleasant. Very pleasant..his name is Zaki Amirul. His age is 33 years old and he is a teacher from one of the primary school in the east..(can i not mention it...heheh).He stay in Hougang for the past 24 years. A very pleasant guy,fair in complexion and be-spectacle. He even read my blog...for the last few months. This is a surprise!!!

There is a lot of things that i have learn from this meeting. Firstly, i just can't judge anyone without even sitting down and talk to them. My perception of others is "judging the cover of the book" and he spotted my weakness..on the spot. I never expect someone like him wanted to meet up with me but i felt a great appreciation and respect for this guy. A person who always think positive and encourage positiveness from others too.

Dear blogger,

The climate is unpredictable..first is rain and next is sunshine..well,that's is common in tropical country in Asia..unless we are in New Zealand.How i wish i could be there...hehehe..maybe one day, insyallah.

I felt my body feverish and start having running nose and cough. That's it..i am down with flu and quickly start popping up and paracetamol and flu medicine down my throat. Never forget the cough syrup...it really help me to sleep. I like the after effect of the medicine,Wozzy and in few seconds my head touch the pillow, i in the dreamland.

Maybe my immune system is not as strong as it used to be..i am lack of vitamin C and B/D and i better check out the pharmacy soon.

Dear blogger,

Why is it that i felt so uneasy whenever i sleep??

Why did i woke up suddenly feeling there is another presence in the room with me??

Why did i have this inutution of waking up in the middle of the night,walk to the kitchen and feeling there is eyes watching me?

Creepy isn't it?

Its been few months and although i have been advised several times to fight this "Bad Karma" feeling in me and closed the window whenever i am going to bed, it's still the same.

Isn't it during Ramadhan, spirits and ghosts are "tied up" but i believe, that's not true. Truly not true.

I have a dreams..i just don't know what it meant but in both dreams, two people whom i care and love appear in it.

The first dream, happen in early Ramadan. In my dream, Cik Rukiah(bro Rashidi late mum) was playing with Adam(when he was a toddler) in their house in Clementi blk 376..in the living room on that big sofa near the TV..she was teasing and playing peek-a-boo with him and i was sitting in the big rattan sofa chair and laugh..hhmmm...

My second dream, happen a few days ago,after my argument with my sister in the kitchen. I dream of my grandma. I was in early primary school, in my school uniform when i was in Pasir Panjang primary(gosh, i still remember that uniform), i was siting in the big table in the kitchen,in our old kampung and was doing my homework..grandma was talking to me about my studies. In the dream, "she was telling me to not to give up if i can't accomplish or complete anything. There is always a solution to every problems."I wasn't paying much attention to her but more focus in my stuffs. When i woke up from my dream, it was around 4.35am...near Sahur and its the same for my earlier dream..was this a message send to me or just a plain dream...??

The dreams and my grandma advice is still linger in my mind,till now. I do miss them both.

Dear Blogger,

I have always wonder if i still have any feelings left towards the guys i have dated and have short relationships in the past..the only way to experience it, when you came face to face with the person..

Do you remember Azarul..??The bodybuilder i dated in late 2006..and broke off in early 2007??The last i heard of news of him, he was banned from participating in a championship in the region,due to sports drugs. He was one of the bodybuilders, which came out in the news few months ago,the six of them was banned by the Association of the Bodybuilding.Although, i heard he was having a on/off relationship with another lady,non-malay,i wonder how do both of us react to each other when we bump into each other??And we did, just yesterday, when i was on the train...

Dear Blogger,

I predicted for this year Hari Raya, it will be more "Laughter's" and "Cheers" than tears as before,for me. My siblings always constantly gather together even for a simple Break-Fast meal, just last Saturday, we gather again for breaking fast,thus at the same time, we all make plan for the next trip to JB..typical of us, being a Singaporean Malay..i think, the Johorian's are cursing and swearing at us for making them stuck in the traffic jam all the time and their shopping centre is raided by Malay's Singaporeans..well, i can feel their "anger's" but hey, they need our Singapore's shopping bug's to excel in their economy status,isn't that rite??

This past few days, i have an uneasy feeling but i just don't know what it is??I am kind of having a scary feeling in me...

Dear Blogger,
This past few days, ever since the 1st day of fasting, i felt very tired and sleepy. Maybe i haven't got used to the timing...hhmmm..
Anyway, i attended Nikki Lavinia maturity party,held at Fairway Club at jurong. It was simply but yet, very beautiful. Of course, the gal "Vasanthan Central" famous aunt and uncle was also attend..she was beautiful and gorgeous with pink and blue Saree's.. The person who caught my attention is Nikko..the ever street-wise kid...hahaha..he is SOooo funny.

I was seated next to Rahman,hoping to meet his wife...but she couldn't make it.

This is Nikki Lavinia

Nikki in green sarees

Nikki and family

with her grandparent and brother

whole family

with aunt and uncle mohan

with me...

with all her dad family

Dear blogger,

Its been quite a while i last update my blog...hhmm..it was a busy weekends and everyday, right after the gym or exercises session, i end up late at home and my body was very tired..i will just flop on my bed..

Its been a great weekends with my family, firstly we attend the wedding of Mak Long Wiyah son,Abang Irfan at Jurong East,managed to get all the siblings gather together..

Then the following week, all of us (except Bro Azman and wife) attend the fireworks at Marina Floating stage and the next day, kenduri at Pak Din house...its been a while and mostly since all of us are married or engaged, each brought their spouse, its seem our family is growing bigger...hhmmm..soon to be Hafizah wedding..whatever the 2 sister's crisis is, i pray and hope they will reconcile soon..one never know what is going to happen next.

Last Saturday, all of us,went to JB for shopping galore. I never bought much except few shirts i got from Angsana Plaza and books..novel..heheheh..i bought 4 of it. It is really worth it..i do enjoy myself but in the beginning, it was like playing cat & mouse on the destination to meet..eventually, we meet up at Perling Mall...it was great. My shopping trip is done...maybe, one of these day, i will drop by Larkin to take my baju...

At the same time,i did managed to attend Rahman pre-wedding dinenr at his house.I was unable to make it to his Nikah and sanding...